Article by Sw Eden (สว อิเฎล) and Jang (แจง)
Before people get married, they have to learn about each other first and then they can decide that both of them can get along well together or not. Because American was taught to make their own decision when they were young, when they grow up, they are more confident than Thai people who have warm family. Maybe this is the main cause of why Thais and American’s courtship custom are totally different in many different ways such as; how long they adapt themselves, how they show their love and studying about each other background.
Because of Americans’ self-confidence, when they feel that they are ready, they can do everything they want as Americans’ marriage although marriage is the one of most important things in every life. The Americans use not too much time to court; we can see the example in almost all American drama movies that two actors just know each other on that day and they date that day, too. The father and the mother do not worry that their child goes out side at night with his or her lover before marriage. These factors let the time of court to be shorter than Thai people because they feel love faster. After they marry, they always have many problems because they don’t understand something that they have never known before.
Americans do not feel shame when they show their love directly in public areas because most of them came from Europe or they came from many places and don’t have their own tradition. When they desire to do something, they just do it right away, such as, kiss on the street or inside the theater. They can argue out loud and do not care that there are others around them.
For Thailand, before a couple get married, both of them have to learn about each other’s background and have to know his or her parents and both families have to be well compatible. In my opinion, background is very important as income, occupation, race, religion, and character of whole family. Rarely, the rich marry with the poor in Thailand or Indians marry with the Chinese, but all of these, we can see normally in America. This is a situation that amazes me; Sw Eden have heard a story of my teacher’s friend. She comes from Thai and her husband is American. They have child and their family was very happy, but one day her husband’s friend came to her house and courted her. He did so often until she changed her mind and married again, his husband’s friend. In Thailand, the new man should wait until that couple was divorce and court the woman. This means American do not care about background.
Courtship of American is different from Thai’s Courtship, such as, time to decide, background, and status. The ways people associate together depend on many factors but the main point is love. If they love each other, the rest does not matter. Love can lead the way for both of them to get through in everything.
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